on the rim

I had such high expectations of myself, and as is so typical, failed miserably. Heard today that after losing quality people (and me) because of the save pay situation,  the FAA has increased the save pay time to 5 years.  That would have gotten me to 30, but two more years living alone in Twin would have been hard for me. I do hope to relearn how to play the piano this year, as I didn't this past one.  I will take lessons, rather than try to teach myself.  If I can find a teacher willing to put up with me. My light has not been bright at all this Christmas season.  I have tried in small ways to shine for others, but I feel that I have not. A year ago,  I was in Rexburg, planning on waiting for the storm to go through, and the roads to be cleared. And now, we focus on Bethlehem, and the birth of the King.  The time of year of the actual birth isn't important.   Maybe the Christians took up the winter solstice, as it represents a tim...

Today was a day that I cannot begin to describe.  It is important to me to try, as inadequate as I feel in doing so. The week before Thanksgiving I was called to serve in the Kansas City Missouri Temple.  My normal shift is Thursday mornings.  I won't go into the details of what that entails, other than to say that is is my responsibility as part of the group working to make sure that patrons to the temple have the best possible experience.  It has not been easy, as there is a lot of training, not just in procedure, but in manner of delivery, which is critical to that experience for those visiting.  They don't take it lightly, and neither do I.  It is a pure form of service to the Lord, to stand in His House, and to be His representative. I have been learning so much in the last few weeks, but never more so than when interacting directly with those who have come to learn, to have burdens eased, to feel the Lord's Spirit.  They have taught me so muc...

Here we are, another December, and a renewal of a great idea. I will be honest.  I came home from Idaho out of sorts.  I thought about how excited last year I was to act on #LightTheWorld , and I documented all of the acts that I did, from my little corner of the universe.  I had no desire to put forward any effort to repeat this year.  I had recently been given an opportunity to serve the Lord, and His Children, and wasn't even thrilled about that. To say that my mind seems like a mess at times is not an exaggeration.  Of course, that is no surprise to those that know me. If you have ever seen "Forgotten Carols" a musical presentation by Micheal McLean, then this will be familiar to you.  There is a scene, where Uncle John was hanging an ornament on the tree that was a quill pen. He told the story of an angel that had wanted to sing at the announcement of the birth of the Savior, and wasn't allowed to.  The angel spoke of the song of his heart....

A war that was a stalemate in France between the Allies and the Central Powers.  Trenches dug, barbed wire strung, and poison gas.  Horrible weapons developed that were devastating for the old style of war.  It was the Great War.  The War to end all wars.  A war so horrible that people thought that humanity could never again engage in such atrocity. Little did they know. November 11, 1918,  was the day of the Armistice, the cease fire to end what would be known as World War One.  Today, we celebrate it as Veteran's Day.  A day to honor those men and women that have served, or are serving in the armed forces of the United States. But so much war can be attributed to that fateful time. The Treaty to end the war was so oppressive on Germany that its newly installed government, bearing the crushing burden of rebuilding a nation also was crushed by war reparations.  How did they solve it?  They devalued their currency.  Oh, and m...

Today I had done some walking, not enough, but since I had that old familiar gouty feeling in the ball of my foot, I knew that I should be very careful.  So, taking the miracle drug Indomethacin, I had made it through the day.  So, after watching the Bedlam game, I decided that I was at least going to walk a little.  So, shoes on, I headed to the track, thinking that I would also do some bleachers while there. Boring, right?  Well, it is my life.  Homework, walking, and some stuff around the house, as well as choir and church.  So, I did the bleachers, and as I am hitting the curve of the track, I hear the sound of water.  So, over by the old fieldhouse, I see a huge puddle, and more water flowing in.  I called the police, (not 911) and they apparently called the school people.  One of them showed up, and realizing it was a leak, turned the lights on, to see where it was.  He found the leak, and realizing it was underneath concrete, ha...

I have been thinking for the last several days that I need to write about this.  I have put it off, always having something that 'needed' to be done.  Tonight, as I was praying, I felt like I needed to put a few thoughts down, no idea why.  If you were a missionary in la Mision Espana Sevilla in 1984, you heard about this talk.  We were taught in Zone Conferences, as I recall.  It has remained with me, and I have seen the truth of it in my life.  The talk was by Elder Melvin J. Ballard, given in the Salt Lake Tabernacle nearly 90 years ago.  It is a lengthy read, but worth it.  The link is below. He spoke about how we are all in a constant battle against Satan.  Satan knows us.  He knows our strengths, he knows our weaknesses.  He has legions to help him, for while they were outnumbered in the War in Heaven, here, we are clearly outnumbered.  But he can only get to us as we let him in. But the battle Elder Ballard speak...

This is running both on the Lib, and Here. Te amo Espana. Siempre I served my mission in Andalucia, serving in Almeria, Algeciras, Jerez de la Frontera, y Jaen.  I love the people there.  I did have a chance to go back in 1990, and was there for just a few days, but not a day goes by without wishing for a trip back. In 1861, as a result of a tumultuous Presidential election in the United States, southern states, beginning with South Carolina, voted to break from the Union, and to form their own nation, separate from the United States of America.  The argument over whether states could secede was settled by blood.  A tragic war that probably was payment for the ugliness of slavery.  Of course, many scholars feel today that states did and still have the right to secede.  Or rather that they did.  The Civil War changed many things. Tomorrow. in the Catalonia area of Spain, a referendum will be held as to whether Catalonia should remain a part of S...

I have an excuse.  What is yours, generic retailer? Tonight the Chorale met, to begin rehearsing for our Christmas program.  I have been waiting 9 months for this.  Yes, we did have the pageant in August, and it was wonderful.  But it was the pageant, and not the chorale.  I am too tired to explain the difference. We were few tonight. I am sure there will be more next week.  Lots of music, with more on the way.  How I love to sing praises to God.  I know that I am a broken man.  That I can sing to God is very humbling.  I have faith that He hears my prayers, whether in secret, or sung. As is typical for a group that hasn't met for a while, we did some reminiscing about days past.  So many songs bring back memories of past concerts.  Whether it is The Birthday of a King , or Christmas Child .  We are singing both of these, and many more. This Christmas, the chorale will be providing music for an evening of singing w...

Back to religious themes. This has been rolling around in my head, since I read it a few weeks ago, but it came home to me while teaching last week. Of course, the usual disclaimers, and since there may be new people to read, I will be pulling my thoughts from the Book of Mormon, Another Witness to Jesus Christ.   Don't be scared off by using this scripture of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, as it is probably thought that most Christians would recognize. In the Book of Alma, a part of the Book of Mormon, Chapter 22, is the history of the sons of Mosiah teaching the Lamanites.   note- At the time, the Nephites were generally the ones that followed God, and the Lamanites were those who fought against them.  Not sure how to detail more than that.  (other than reading it, of course)  Specifically, Aaron was teaching Lamoni's father, who was king of all the lamanites.  Teaching the idea of a loving God, and His plan of redemption of mank...

I am not sure that anyone from my High School Class will read this.  But it is a good introspection for me, so here goes. Thank you. Thank you to those who worked so hard to put the reunion together.  It was an amazing time.  Yes, I really did have a good time. Thank you to those who actually came up to talk to me.  I hope you didn't do it because you felt like I didn't know anyone, or that I didn't feel part of the group.  I did.  If you did do it for that reason, then thank you, and bless you, for caring enough to do so.  I struggle mightily with initiating conversation.  I think part of it is just my reluctance to intrude on someone's space, or conversation, but more likely, it is just my way. For me, crowds are a challenge. I don't struggle too much with crowds at an event, like a game, or concert, because we are all there to watch, so interaction is limited.  In party situations, it is completely different.  A lot of people ...

Tomorrow night, I will be watching HS football, as is my custom.  But not the normal venue. The last time I attended a game at Barry and Congress, they only played Saturdays, as there were no lights.  And, I watched the game while wearing black wool, and a red glittery overlay.  With a wonderfully large white fiberglass sousa on my shoulder. Or, rather, it seemed large to me, as I was only 5'2" as a Senior. Yup, it is the 35 year reunion.  A time to gather, to remember the old days, to see how people have changed and so on.  It has been a long time.  Of course, I grew upward and outward, but even at 53, I am not giving up.  I walk at least 4 miles a day, (not sundays) and try to minimize the calories (the only real way to lose weight).  And while I don't play regularly, I do have a helicon, which I pick up to practice for Tuba Christmas, if I can make it. (yeah, time to start).  I do like to sing, Of course, if you have read here before, ...

This is one of those types of posts that could easily be over on the Lib. First, let me say that as I have been studying the Book of Mormon, this chapter really struck me this time around.  For those not of my faith, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, I encourage you to read the post, if not the link at the bottom as well.  The Book of Mormon was truly written for our day. Before going into the specifics, though many of my Latter Day Saints friends probably will pick right up on it, Let me describe, in generalities what was going on. The Book of Mormon follows a remnant of God's children as they escape Judea about 600 BC, and are led to the Americas.  It follows their ups and downs, their divisions and wars, and most importantly, the visit of Jesus Christ to the Americas after his resurrection.  The selection is from around 74 BC. They were a nation built on Judeo Christian principles While these principles were followed, there was peace and p...

Dysfunction. That would be one way to describe my dealings with family.  Probably an accurate description.  Not probably.  It is.  In the weeks following the Families are Eternal pageant, this has been constantly on my mind.   They are eternal .  I have written a lot on families this summer.  In my opinion, this concept is one of the greatest revelations received regarding the Plan of Salvation.  The restoration of priesthood keys for this to be possible is dramatically detailed in Section 110 of the Doctrine and Covenants (modern day revelation of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints), and is one of my favorite passages So, applicability today?  To me? I am reading this, and already imagining what some of my kids will be thinking when, or if they read it, and watch.  What started the desire to relate was this video that I came across.  I like it not because of the outcome (though I am happy for them), but for what ...

One more night. For more information about the pageant Families are Eternal, please read the previous blog post. There have been a number of highs through the week.  And I truly expect that will continue through tomorrow night.  Let me highlight a few. Tonight had a rough start.  It was a technical problem.  It was resolved.  We started over, and the program went well.  My son, his wife, and son were there.  A re acquaintance with a wonderful man that served as an AP during my mission.  He drove over two hours to come up and watch.  Members of my ward were there as well. As the Joseph Smith scene progressed, and we watched and sang, I felt like it was something that I had watched before, along with the rest of heaven, with great anticipation in the spring of 1820. When he followed through and prayed, we rejoiced, knowing the gospel was going to be restored.   Yes, it really did feel like that.  It is with wonder and awe tha...

Who am I? Why am I here? Where did I come from? After death, what? For centuries, the philosophers of men have taken these questions, parsed them, tried to explain, and ultimately, not be able to answer them. These are variations of the questions that God asked Job.  Bottom line? If you have read the Rim from the beginning, then you know I have probably answered to some extent, each question.  I could spend a lot of time answering, but the answers are: A child of God To receive a body, to gain experience, choosing right from wrong, to learn faith and obedience.  To repent. As a son of God, I came from His presence.  No, I can't remember, as NONE of us can.  We can't demonstrate faith if we have a perfect knowledge. We go to paradise.  Our spirits freed from physical suffering.  We go to anxiously await the reuniting of our bodies.  For those who were true and faithful on earth, it is a paradisaical state.  For those who h...

My son Ben gave a talk for the ages at church today.  He works with special needs youth, and is working on finishing his degree.  He has grown immeasurably in the last several years.  A proud moment, for a proud father.  Not that I had anything to do with that.  I suspect much has to do with his wonderful wife, Tausha. I read a study that showed that atheists are far more close minded than religious types.  That stands to reason, of course, as to be a true believer in nothing, requires a complete rejection of the world around us.  The world testifies of God, or if you would rather, intelligent design.  Believing that life just happened seems to me harder to believe than that God created the world. I am content to wait and learn the mechanics of creation, and not get into the details that no one can know with certainty now. God is our Father.  Whether you choose to believe or not, has NO impact on the fact that He IS our Father.  He...

I am sitting here, honestly not believing that 7 months into retirement, I have been so busy.  When did I ever have time to get anything done while working?   Yes, I spend a lot of time online, probably too much, but it gives me something to process, and to get ready for the upcoming semester.  So, at least it is a rationale for keeping my head buried in the BS that has become our political discourse. Back from camp, I am grateful that we did not deal with the heat that they are dealing with this week.  I truly enjoyed it, something I have not been able to say for a few years.  Maybe it is the lost weight that allowed me to get around easier.  I so enjoy talking to people that I have known for years, and they always SEEM glad to talk to me.  It seems that most of the more senior people know me.  They are always so welcoming and kind.  In many ways, I feel closer to these wonderful people, whom I see one week of the year, than to many others...

an opinion.  normal disclaimers. I wanted to write a little about a something that has given me a place to feel a part, to be in a brotherhood.  Probably I would not be so enthusiastic about the Boy Scouts of America, were it not for this program. What prompted me to opine on this group?  I was on the Facebook page, and read some rather disparaging comments about the program.  Calling it "Fake" , or a "secret society" , in direct violation of the Youth Protection Training.  Many other things.  It bothered me, especially as one poster complaining about the program stated that he had been tapped in years ago, and had just been to the Tapping this past week. (probably the best tapping that I have seen in years) I am referring to the Tribe of Mic-O-Say , which is the Honor Camping Society for the Pony Express Council, in St. Joseph, MO.  The Heart of America Council, based in Kansas City, also has a Mic-O-Say program.  Heart of America, also u...

I was having a discussion the other night, and we were talking about the importance of developing good prayer habits.  We talked about how God is always listening, and I mean ALWAYS! I am probably on Facebook too much.  Besides Facebook, I do have a Twitter thing, and I write this blog, as well as my alter ego writing the political one. I also love email.  I use them as tools to communicate.  I am not a fan of phone calls, and even though I usually don't initiate conversations,  I end up talking too much when people get me started.   By the way, when I start getting into subjects you don't like, or care about, shut me up!  Maybe that is why I hate the phone.   I won't take offense. I promise.    Probably the use of  non oral communications allows me to formulate, and think before hitting send, or enter. Sorry, went on a little rabbit trail, for a second. Any way, while we were talking, I came up with this idea.  Let me kn...

Thankfully, it was not long lived.  I have learned in the past week what a gift music is to me.  I know that all can enjoy it, but for me it is an essential experience, ranging from extreme highs to lows, from spiritual peaks to valleys of despair.  There is no middle ground.  That is why it was so painful to feel nothing.  I know, I am a nut case.  I get it, but we all have our things, and mine is music. Tonight was a rehearsal for the Families are Eternal Pageant .  I had mentioned the pageant in previous posts.  We are now working on the music, and the staging.  It was tight quarters at the Independence Stake Center tonight, as there were many things going on.  So instead of the gym, we were in the Relief Society room.  No bother, we adapted.  I was slightly disappointed to find that it will be held indoors, as I was hoping for the full olde school pageant experience,   The reason is completely legit, and that is that...

I would love to say that I have moved beyond my apathy for music, but it hasn't happened yet.  Having said that, I have decided to keep singing because, I know that just like when I don't feel like praying is when I need to pray the most, the same with singing.  While I may be singing by rote, and not fully feeling the music, I will still sing, knowing that I will feel that joy again. The morning started with the power off, and a lot of things do do for a Saturday, starting with pageant rehearsal.  This is setting up the next several weeks of pretty serious practicing, for the Families are Eternal Pageant .  This pageant will be held Aug. 9-12, at the Independence Stake Center.  Information for the pageant can be found at:     http://familiesareeternal.org/ After returning home, and with the power still out, I headed up to the Stake Center for Priesthood Leadership Training.  This Stake Conference we are blessed to have a member of the ...

I went down to the sacred store, Where I'd heard the music years before, but the man there said the music wouldn't play. Don McLean-American Pie Caution-Some very real and very raw feelings. I am not deaf, yet.   I can still sing, and maintain a pitch, and feel that I do okay at it.  I just don't want to, and I don't know why.  I wanted to put this in writing while I am feeling it.  Hoping all the while that it passes. I felt there were good messages at church today, but all day I was feeling off. The director had to leave before the closing hymn, so she asked me if I would direct it. (Her family sits right behind us)  I did, but I struggled to focus on the song.   I teach the Deacon's Quorum, (12-13 year old young men) and I felt m y lesson was flat, no doubt, as a result of this feeling. I came home, and wanted to break every thing musical.  I didn't, so my bass is intact, as is the piano.  I didn't trash my music or my chanter. ...

For those who may read and are not members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, let me explain before beginning. Each Sunday we have the most important meeting of the week.  We call it Sacrament meeting.  During this meeting, we receive the bread and water as symbols of Christ, to call us to repentance, and to rededicate ourselves to Him each week.  Following this ordinance of Sacrament, meetings are usually talks given by selected members of the congregation.  As there is no paid clergy at the local level, any one may be selected.  They are given specific topics, but how they approach them is up to them, Usually the first Sunday of each month is designated as "Fast Sunday".  Members fast for two meals, and the money that they would have spent on those two meals is to be given to the church for support of the needy.  We also gain spiritual strength by fasting, as it teaches us to master our physical bodies,  On Fast Sunday, inst...

Now don't go thinking that I have posted this in the wrong blog.  The politics of today have nothing to do with liberty, or freedom.  But to investigate this, we need to hit the way back machine. Disclaimer, that there is SOME opinion, so I represent myself, and no one else. In the Garden of Eden , Adam and Eve were living in paradise.  They had to but reach out and pick fruit to eat.  There was no danger in attacks by animals, and since no one else was there, there was no reason for fear.  It was a perfect place.  Well, almost perfect.  No, of course as it was created by God, the garden was perfect.  Adam and Eve went about their day, not suffering, yet not experiencing true happiness either.  No sadness, but no real joy either.  They were just there.  And then there was that tree. Too many people have castigated Mother Eve for being the first to partake of the fruit.  We know the story, she was "tricked" into eating ...

Having got my rental books sent back, and final grades for my classes, school is over for the semester.  It has been one of those things that have helped me to focus in my unemployment.  To not worry about work, or what has been happening in my absence. I bought a bass guitar, a left-handed Paul McCartney Beatles knock off, and an amp, and am working on learning.  I also have quite a bit of work to do around the house, but a lot of it is on hold, waiting for a contractor to replace my basement floor. I dabble too much in political opinion, and though few read what I write in my altar ego, I enjoy doing it, and am always happy when people comment on it.  Again, I do it for me. I wasn't hired for staff at camp.  That is a good problem for a BSA scout camp to have.  Too many adults want to work, so no vacancy.  It was a downer, but no bother,  I get to spend the week hanging out with friends, and not being tied down to a job.  With the LDS...